Monday, 24 October 2011

Am I Too Late For the Party?!

So there's been this little video blog (or vlog, as the cool kids say--which explains why I didn't use that abbreviation) challenge going around some different blogs wherein you record a video of yourself pronouncing some words, answering questions, and getting your voice--your accent--out there!

I've been wondering for about a week if I should participate.

Hearing my voice might shatter the grand illusions of how magnificent sounding you imagine me to be, and then you'll never come back again. All six of you. Though to be fair, four of you are related to me so you have to keep coming back, otherwise I'm not mailing you your Christmas presents.


I am not above blackmail.

But back to my original point of shattered illusions. I mean, what if hearing my voice makes you, the other two, want to stab your eardrums with the shards of those shattered illusions? I can't be held responsible for that, if you do. Just know there are people out there who have far worse sounding voices than I do. Like Karen, off Will & Grace. (And just shut up about it! I know she was a character and the actress was faking that voice. What-ever.)

But I wrestled with my demons, ate some chocolate, read some Paulo Coelho and felt all spiritually enlightened, and decided to go for it. Also, I was really bored this weekend and had nothing else to do. Oh the agony of honesty!

But now for some other disclaimers:

(1) My skin colouring appears lily white instead of freckletastic. No, I do not know how to airbrush myself and no such tricks have been employed. If you too want to achieve this look, you just need a really shitty webcam.

(2) Could I not have done something about my damn hair? It's all scraggly, and there's that one bang that just flops around trying to get in the shot. And I keep firmly brushing it out of my eye, but that bang is basically that one camera hog friend that everyone knows who just wants all the attention. Irritating.

(3) I say 'um' a lot. Clearly I have never taken any sort of public speaking or self-promotion classes. I really am an appalling public speaker. When I gave the maid of honour toast at my cousin B's wedding last year, I thought I was going to do a face plant into the podium I was so GD nervous. There was a giant ballroom of people listening to me esteem the virtues of my dearest friend, and I'm pretty sure they had no clue what I was actually saying. Was I speaking English? Or Farsi? Or French? Or that Hobbit language that all the nerds know? When I get nervous, my voice shakes, I struggle to remember how to speak, and I tongue-twist my words. This happens.

(4) The length. Oh, the (double) horror. I have no idea what I managed to ramble on about for this long. Just stay tuned, there's a prize at the end.

(6) The fact I have no accent. I am wasting your time! For an extravagantly long period of time!

(7) I have put my own Canadian spin on the exercise by adding two of my own words. If I'm going to be a follower at least I'm going to be a unique one, right?

(8) There's no prize.

So that's it. If you want to participate here's my modified list of words, and the phrases.

Aunt, route, wash, oil, theatre, iron, salmon, caramel, fire, water, sure, data, ruin, crayon, toilet, New Orleans, pecan, both, again, probably, spitting, image, about, lawyer, house, coupon, mayonnaise, syrup, pajamas, caught.

What is the bug that curls into a ball when you touch it?
What is it called when you throw toilet paper on a house?
What is the bubbly carbonated drink called?
What do you call gym shoes?
What do you say to address a group of people?
What do you call the kind of spider that has an oval-shaped body and extremely long legs?
What do you call your grandparents?
What do you call the wheeled contraption in which you carry groceries at the supermarket?
What do you call it when rain falls while the sun is shining?
What is the thing you use to change the TV channel?

And um, if um, you, um, also, um, want, um, to, um, include, um, the word 'um', um, I'd, um, like, um, to hear, um, how, um, other, um, people, um, pronounce, um, that.


Helen said...

Yay, another voice to a blog! And it was so nice to hear a Canadian accent. I miss them.

1. How I Met Your Mother is crazy good. I love the beaver song.

2. I too bleached out all my freckles in the video process.

3. Your glasses are awesome.

CherylfromSaskatchewan said...

See - I knew it!! We western Canadians do not have an accent!

Maybe the rain and sun combined are called sun showers? That is what we call them here in Sask.

Anonymous said...

Hi!! Loved seeing you again! Felt like you were sitting across the table from me!! I think you have a "caitie" accent though as a few words you said different then I would! Also a shopping cart I call a buggy. Where are all these "vlogs" being posted? It would be neat to see them! Miss you! I still owe you an e-mail!!

Anonymous said...

Ohh, and P.S. you look GORGEOUS!!

Dad said...

Hi Cait - Really enjoyed the video; that's a new twist on your blog eh? (Eh), now that's Canadian! I used to call the bugs that curl up Armadillo bugs, because they have a shell kind of like an Armadillo. I believe the official name is Sow bugs.

Caitie said...

Helen--There is as a story behind those glasses (as with most things). I'll have to share it some time. The beaver song is hilarious, but my favourite is 'Let's go to the Mall'. I You Tube if from time to time ;)

Cheryl--a sun shower! Makes perfect sense, I have now filed that information away in case I'm the last person on the jeopardy list and no one else can make it! Fingers crossed it's a question that comes up! And totally, no accents here!

Jana--Oh blush. You're nice. We should skype. It will be like going out for lunch, except I'll eat my dinner and you will be eating breakfast ;-)

Dad--a Sow bug. Ew!!! Do they stink? I imagine them to smell really bad. Like a stink bug.