It's from Bridget Jones's Diary, and if you haven't seen that movie your life has a gaping hole in it. You probably don't think your life has a gaping hole in it, but I assure you it does. In fact, the hole is so large that the half-ton dad (who was featured on one of those classic TLC specials about insanely obese people who lie in bed all day and have family members bring them buckets of cola and fried chicken) could totally have his bed wheeled into that gaping hole and he'd disappear; and let's face it: no one ever thought that the immobile half-ton dad would ever disappear.
So for the sake of the half-ton dad, go watch Bridget Jones's Diary and patch up that gaping hole in your life.
(But not the sequel. Please, do not watch the sequel.)
Now, the reason that I'm discussing this cinematic gem (while also referencing some not-so-quality television) is because our friends from Canada are here! And one night Alexi and I found ourselves discussing our Hollywood leading men interests, and I mentioned Colin Firth--as in Mr. Darcy, both of the BBC Pride & Prejudice miniseries and Bridget Jones's Diary.
She died of laughter.
Then she came back to life long enough to say: "But he's old!" and died of laughter again.
Umm, Alexi...how could you not get on board WITH THIS?
"Alexi, this is Colin Firth. I am very disappointed to learn that you aren't in love with my ascot, floppy hair, and piercing upper-class gaze. Good lord woman, get it together! I am a fine specimen! I understand you are a newlywed though, and only have eyes for your new husband...I guess that's okay...FOR NOW."
But apart from our differing taste in Hollywood leading men (and the fact that Dan and Clarence cringe about this conversation) all has been going great, and Dan and I are really enjoying having them here.
The happy honeymooners.
(The cow in the background is no accident. I strategically planned this.)
Oh yes, Alexi and Clarence are also on their honeymoon, so we have gone the extra mile to make sure that everything is up to snuff at (what Clarence has dubbed our home) C&D's B&B.
It's the least we can do...we didn't get them a wedding gift.
I decided that since they were going to spending some time in good old Switzerland, a 'Welcome to Switzerland' basket was in order.
Sigg water bottles: the original Swiss, BPA free, environmentally friendly, let's-not-throw-crap-all-over-the-earth, rock star bottles that help keep you hydrated and looking stylish while hiking.
(The black one is my favourite. I wanted to keep it. Don't tell them that)
Bonherba cough drops: Sort of like Ricola, but as far as I can tell they haven't gone global and made it onto Canadian shelves, so they're still novel. And as anyone knows, travelling takes it out of you; sometimes you need a soothing throat lozenge.
Sweat bandanas to be worn around the neck, to also help look the part of a Swiss hiker. *True/funny story alert*--this week we were sitting at an alpine patio enjoying the views, and Clarence was rocking the black bandana around his neck. A couple of Swiss hikers walked up to the patio, and the lady was wearing an identical black bandana around her neck. Deciding he couldn't have a patio bandana twin, Clarence reached into his bag and pulled out the blue bandana for a quick outfit change. I don't know why, but I found this extremely funny. Maybe the air was thin up there? Maybe it was because of all those Bonherbas that I've been eating like candy? What sort of herbs are in Bonherba?
Chocolate...because DUH! I don't know if this is a tasty brand, but it's one not found in Canada (unlike Swiss brands Lindt and Nestle) so it's the one I bought.
Cow magnets because they are awesome!
Spitzbuben cookies. Dan's crazy about these, so I figured they should be in the basket.
Cute postcard that I wrote our 'Welcome to Switzerland' greeting on. This postcard was bought at the quaintest little shop that keeps the strangest hours...even for Switzerland.
Currently our newlywed love birds have flown the nest for a couple days, and will be back on Sunday when we'll have ourselves a little Canadian Thanksgiving in Switzerland.
I think I'll spend Saturday sleeping--there's been some early mornings, yo. For example, I knew the sun set, but did you guys know that it RISES too?? Neither did I until this week. And hot damn, does it ever rise early.
Pretty, yes, but this isn't a sight you should regularly expect me to document.
It's too early.
Early rising is not in my contract.
It never has been.
This has caused problems in my past student/professional days when I somedays woke up and literally had to choose between showering or eating.
It's been a life-long curse.
That's why it's not in my contract.
And since we're discussing my contract, I want to know why I have to clean my own dressing room? Also I insist on more Bonherba cough drops before I bring you an encore presentation of our adventures.
And now, BACK TO STUDIO!
(encore presentation will be coming)